If You’re Struggling With Your Blog, This is Your Wake-Up Call5 min read

Stop lying. To yourself. To others. In the comments section of your blog. On other people’s blogs. In your about page. Stop lying.

“I don’t care if people read my stuff or not.”

“I blog for me, myself, and I.”


If that were true, you’d be writing in a notepad. Or several. Hiding them away under your bed or in a closet. But you’re on the world wide web for a reason, and that reason is to be read.

But no one reads your blogs, so you have to lie. And I’d use that terrible, terrible cliche that the road to hell is paved with lies and good intentions and adverbs, but the truth is that lies are the bricks that help build hell here on earth. A kind of hell that you have to live with for the rest of your life.

So, yeah, stop lying to yourself.

The first step in solving any problem is recognizing you have one.

You have no readers. So what? I didn’t have any readers when I first started blogging. I brainwashed myself into acting with the sort of enthusiasm that opens doors, not turns them into walls.

But in order to do that you have to admit that you are writing in the hopes of someone reading your words.

We all do.

And it’s okay.

Don’t settle.

Average always has an excuse (or several) as to why it’s not great. Great is too busy being humbled by the struggle to even have an opinion about its own greatness.

Most bloggers are afraid. They are afraid they’re not as good as they have to be in order to have the success they want, so they come up with a bunch of excuses.

I know, because I read about them every single day. It’s either some change in algorithms, some change in policy, or the system’s broken, and someone should fix them in order for them to get more readers or earn money.

Yeah, and I’d very much like to be able to levitate, but there’s this thing call the law of gravity, so I can either complain about it or work on building myself a plane.

When faced with external or internal limitations, we often try to brainwash ourselves into thinking that somehow life’s unfair. It’s not. The system is not broken.

It is what it is. You either learn the rules, so you can win at this game, or you don’t, and you lose. But no one likes a crybaby, a sour loser.

If it were easy…

Everybody would be doing it.

Yet, somehow, they don’t.

Most folks who purchase gym memberships never go to the gym more than a few times. That’s such a sure thing that the pricing of memberships is influenced by it.

Now, let me ask you: how many people do you think give up blogging altogether even after having paid me hundreds of dollars to coach them?

Do you want to know the answer?

The vast majority of them.

Also, every single one of my first sponsors (from 2012) have deleted their blogs.

This is the type of statistic that often makes people want to give up, or just tell themselves that they are either blogging for themselves or blogging about such obscure things that no other human being could ever relate.

When you feel like giving up, that’s when you have to take massive action.

Three months ago I enrolled in the Medium Partner Program. I had some 90 followers on Medium, a few blog posts, and I was faced with the task of building an audience.

Even though that’s what I’ve been doing on other platforms for the past eight years.

Even though I felt entitled to a bit of attention, or at least that folks should know who I was, the truth was that I was no one in particular here, so I could either give up or take massive action in order to stop thinking about what I considered to be an unfair situation.

The truth? I didn’t put in the time to build an audience here, so I had no reason to expect any sort of attention or special treatment. I had to work like everyone else. And I felt like giving up, just like everyone else.

But whenever I feel like giving up, whenever I try to rationalize my fears and insecurities, that’s when I remind myself that almost everything I do in life is because I don’t want to be like everyone else.

I want to be a successful blogger, so there’s no room for excuses. I don’t get paid for excuses, but for results. I get new readers by offering value and helping my current readers solve certain problems.

And unless you admit that you, too, want to have an impact on other people’s lives, that you have to play the game and obey the rules, you’ll struggle to gain traction because you just won’t be part of the conversation that is taking place in the world of blogging.

And I always get this feeling whenever I read the posts of those who complain about the game being rigged, or that they don’t care about their readers, or that blogging in a professional capacity (so you earn a bit of money) is lame or something like that. Yeah… that’s the guy who calls the cops because their neighbors are throwing a party but forgot to invite him.

Be honest with yourself. Tell yourself where you want to go, and write down what you need in order to make that journey a reality.

Oh, and don’t forget to enjoy the journey, because the destination won’t be as exciting as you can make it appear inside your head.

It’s okay to want readers. It’s okay to want to monetize your blog. It’s okay to want to sell stuff to strangers over the Internet. It’s okay to want views, comments, and shares.

And, truth be told, if you don’t have the guts to admit this to yourself, if you do not ask, what kind of answer do you think you’ll get?

Cristian Mihai

Became Internet famous by the age of 23. Never recovered. I write short author bios all over the web. I’m an acquired taste. Don’t like me? Acquire some taste.

61 thoughts on “If You’re Struggling With Your Blog, This is Your Wake-Up Call5 min read

  1. I want my writing to make me rich and famous. Okay, I’d settle for rich. I also don’t want to work for it. This is problematic.

    However, after due consideration, I’d rather be poor than overworked.

  2. The numbers game definitely gets to me sometimes but I’m working on being 100% honest with myself and my (limited – for now) readers so that anyone who visits my blog is seeing and reading my authentic self.

      1. Yes. For a while I wanted to become a motivational speaker.

        But teaching? Don’t know. I like to inspire. Or motivate. Or just let others know what has worked for me.

  3. I love this. You are absolutely right about its okay if you have no readers etc. Things happen in time and you have to continue to push through. I don’t understand why someone would want to lie to themselves about anything. People tend to find the lie easier to deal with I guess. I will admit that I really don’t have readers and I’m okay with that, but I do know that I will eventually get there. Having readers, likes, comments can all mess with your mind and have you question yourself. I choose to push through until I get where I want to be.

    1. Thank you, Kiyana.

      Well, people lie to themselves for a ton of reasons. To get something they want or to pretend they don’t want something they don’t have. Tens of reasons.

  4. Trrruuuueee! I just want to be read and share what I think with others that think like I think. The struggle is being patient through the process.

  5. I have the opposite problem. I know my stuff is “good enough” — I’ve been writing professionally and “semi-professionally” (i.e., same quality, no pay) for over two decades. (Yes, I’m old.) For me, it’s a matter of having enough patience to develop a readership. In the meantime, I do treat it as writing “for myself”: otherwise, I’d not do it!
    I’m observing some patterns so far. I’ve linked my blog posts to my LinkedIn feed, and I get a few readers from there, for both the music reviews and book reviews. I also have received some attention from other WordPress bloggers, which is actually quite gratifying, but, oddly, for the book reviews, which aren’t really the point (though I certainly enjoy pounding them out!).

  6. I blog for the sake of community–being part of it, participating in it.

    I enjoy reading blogs, and I learn a lot from the comments others leave on my posts.

    Don’t know if I care about the number of people who read me, but I certainly like that I have made so many friends over the years, some of whom I have met in real life, and who I bond with on social media, as well.

    For me, blogging is about people, always will be.

  7. That’s me too, Damyanti. I read many more blog posts than I write. There is always something fascinating, inspiring, creative, etc. to find here on WordPress and it’s good to learn more about the people behind the stories. I admit that I do feel warm and fuzzy when others acknowledge my posts, but mainly for the contact and feeling of belonging that it brings.

  8. We don’t all kid ourselves, Cristian!
    I am the worst blogging failure I have ever seen.
    After 2 years and 173 posts I am speaking into stony silence every week
    (apart from one kind soul, who keeps my comment section alive on her own).
    I can hardly bear to look at my stats, and actually get anxiety symptoms each Monday before I log in (to see how a post has done).
    I feel utterly crushed, but go on writing as well as I can, without hope.
    Blogging has brought me to despair.

    1. Hi Ken,

      You are consistent and perseverant. Those are great traits to have.

      Now, there’s also the fact that you must change your strategy. Experiment.

      What are some blogs that are similar to yours, but enjoy success?

      Also, as you share poetry, maybe a different social platform my yield better results. I am thinking of Atticus and all the other poets who found success on Instagram.

      If you change nothing, nothing changes, and banging your head on a wall in the hope of it turning into a door is not a viable long term strategy.

      Also, do not underestimate the importance of networking with fellow bloggers. What other blogs do you read? How often do you comment on those blogs?

      Striving to make friends in the blogging community is another great way to find readers.

      Also, search for websites that showcase poetry or bloggers willing to interview you.

      1. Thank you for the response, Cristian!
        In my case everything gets spoilt by the severity of chronic illness: It takes me several days working on a post, afterwards I feel too burnt out to do much for a few days then it’s time to start work on the next one.
        I lack the energy to network much, and am not on other platforms.
        (I would have paid for reblogs long ago if I wasn’t paranoid about using my credit card online!)
        Thank you.

      2. Then post once every two weeks. Spend one week on networking.

        Networking is crucial, and it could also be fun and inspire your poetry.

        As for using a credit card online: I use a different card for online purchases. One that I do not keep money on, and only trasfer money on that card when I need to make a purchase.

      3. Your replies are excellent and very useful, Cristian!
        (I did not have time to reply yesterday.)
        (Had not heard about poetry on instagram.)
        On many points I agree with you completely, and have been thinking along similar lines.
        The reason I’ve felt tied to my current unsuccessful method is rooted in fear.
        Having a potentially life-threatening illness that is incurable and progressive and may soon require drugs (such as morphine) which interfere with mental clarity: has kept me focussed on putting as much old work as possible online while I’m still able, since time is running out for me.
        That is why I try so hard to keep blogging rather than diversify and network, which might get the stats up.
        However, when I’ve got through more of the backlog and feel able to relax a little, I plan to follow much of your good advice, for which I am grateful.

        (Frustratingly, I can’t seem to find an “e-card” for online use in the UK, at present. )

        Thank you, once again!

  9. Hit home pretty hard for me. I’m in the middle of building up my writing presence and am fixing to launch a Patreon page for my story writing. It’s scary.

    But I’ve put off doing my dreams for so long but I simply can’t do that to myself anymore. I really want to find an audience and I do want my work read. Hopefully, that comes with time and persistence. Thanks for the post.

  10. Do NOT stop writing, I consider my blog as practice. It’s like singing; you need to warm up. Blogging is my warming up for my story and novel writing. I do read your blog when I can.

  11. Love what you wrote here: “Average always has an excuse (or several) as to why it’s not great. Great is too busy being humbled by the struggle to even have an opinion about its own greatness.”

  12. I’ve always been open about my desire for readers. I do write for personal reasons, but I also want to reach people. Writing with no interest in appealing to readers is like smiling at someone in the dark.

    1. It’s all a balancing act. Sometimes it feels like walking on tightrope… We must write what we want, how we want, but we must also write in such a way that our readers understand us.

      We must also be careful not to sell our souls in order to get readers, and to end up writing about what we care little for.

  13. I’m an avid reader of this blog and one thing I’ve learnt is I’m not alone.
    There are a lot of people that want to improve their views, followers, likes and comments. I felt alone before but right now. I don’t.
    Also, I remember when you mentioned the 10,000 hour rule. I’m taking everything step by step.

  14. Yes, we all lie to some degree about our need to be recognized. Just earlier this morning I commented on some else’s blog about not receiving comments. I do not receive many and it matters. Eventually, after I have been doing this longer maybe they will pick up. It does make me question myself.

  15. I enjoyed reading your post. Everything is unfiltered which I like the most. It’s okay to feel inadequate, but that doesn’t mean you’re not good at anything. That’s why I always tell myself that we all have that kind of uniqueness, so there’s no need to compete. Competing is never enjoyable in the first place, but doing something that you enjoy the most to help you grow not just a good blogger but also as a good person would do. 😉💗😁

  16. so very true, it’s always good to be satisfied with your self but a little nudge from anyone who ever they maybe even a hater will spark a fire inside of you.

    After all a life without adversaries or challenges is dull and there’s no excitement or food for the fire that burns inside all of us.

  17. Thank you Christine for such meaningful post and telling the truth. I completely agree with everything you said and it was totally relatable.

  18. I think that the most important thing you have to bring to the table, is enthusiasm. Masses of real, jumping up and down enthusiasm… Miserable people don’t get anywhere in this business…

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